The process of creating is where I often confront my fears, especially when I’m working in new mediums, using different tools, or staring at a blank canvas wondering how to begin. Sometimes I avoid the project that is presenting a challenge and do something else while hoping the solution will turn up on its own. But my intention is to improve, and to get better I spend a lot of time learning. I study other artists’ work, read, watch YouTube videos, take workshops, and practice on smaller surfaces.
In the process of navigating through life there will often be times when we are faced with fear of the unknown. The injustices, violence, climate change, and corruption are evident in every daily news headline, which is why I’ve chosen to take a hiatus from the news. I am reminded that we are all one big world-wide family. Nothing like a pandemic, natural disaster, or war to bring everyone together – or tear us apart. We have nowhere to run and hide, especially on an island. We are vulnerable and left to confront every single fear we may have had whether real or perceived.
Personally, these times have helped me get clear on my values. I notice the small things and take the time to appreciate all my senses, I don’t take anyone or anything for granted, and have become more discerning with my activities which has helped me to focus. With less distractions, as a benefit, my time in the studio has increased. How I deal with my vulnerability is going to be the trajectory for my future. How we deal with our vulnerability as a world is going to paint a picture of our future existence on our planet. It is an opportunity for us to transform.
Professionally, this time has given me a new vision. This vision requires a lot more time learning. It also means practicing what I learn. Creating is as much (if not more) about the intuitive component as it is about technical knowledge. We are the creators of our lives, and we can create a better world for ourselves and for everyone by examining our values and behaviors, listening to indigenous people, people of color, people who are from different socio-economic backgrounds, people who pray to different Gods, and getting curious, and if possible making contributions to causes. If everything is falling apart, that’s a GOOD THING because it means we must re-assemble, re-create.
It takes an enormous amount of self-discipline to keep at it in the studio –especially when anxiety creeps into my psyche when things are not going well. I have changed the way I respond to discomfort by being brave. When I do not know, I set out to learn. I promise to do my best as a person and as an artist, and the time is now. I hope you hold me accountable.